Our family calendar is full. With 2 teens in the house, some activity is always going on. My own father became frustrated after I repeatedly turned down dinner invitations.
Ah, you never have time for your parents, he sighed.
Dad, I have the time. I just need to book it. Don’t you remember what it’s like to have teenagers in the house?
We have obligations. I’m never living in the moment. My brain is already thinking about next Wednesday.
A few posts ago I wrote about juggling too many plates, knowing when to let the plates drop and warning against making people our plates. Specifically, I began to think of worshiping in church as an obligation, one causing me to act resentful. A response caught my eye and I’d like to share it with you.
My friend and fellow church-goer, Carter, is 20 years sober. After he read the post, he commented:
Well, when I first started reading this I thought it was going to be about food......it's what I think of when I see the word "plate". Then I realized it was about juggling something I know nothing about. One of the nice things about being a retired chronic drug addict is that I'm not burdened by the nonsensical intellectual thought patterns of a healthy brain. In other words, I don't get to over-think service.
There are a few key phrases that have been drilled into my brain, like "keep it simple stupid" and "if you want to keep something you have to give it away" or "if you want to get different results take different actions". And for someone like me who has to "live one day at a time", I've become okay with relating to God as a "conscious part of my every day thought". Which brings me back full-circle to the food concept, "You can't stay full on yesterday's hamburger" is another reminder that this is a one day at a time adventure.
These things that are discussed in the context of obligations are more like nourishment to me and I love to eat! I feel nourished when I am of service. I feel fulfilled when I think of God as my subsidence. I feel blessed to even have quality problems in areas were at one point I had no areas at all. Sometimes my gloating and doting of and to my blessings is annoying to others who don't understand that more times than I could've lost it all I did lose it all. In this next phase of my life I am living in a fairytale and I'm happy to be the toad.
Well, shut my mouth.
Compared to most, my life has been relatively easy. I often get caught up in the “poor me, I’m so busy” mode, I selfishly forget there are others who absolutely live day by day.
Some because they don’t have a choice.
Some, because like Carter, they know what hell is and they’ll spend each morning thanking God for another sunrise.
I need friends like Carter to remind me how lucky I am. And if I feel my day is too packed and busy? I’ll thank God for the opportunity to be a light for Him and work in some time for rest.
I can plan to live in the moment, can’t I?
Ugh. This may be harder than I thought.